Why did Superman Return?

Caveat to the reader: If you haven't seen "Superman Returns" you may want to avoid reading any further as this post contains content that may "spoil" your movie, in the event that you choose to see it in the future.

I have always loved Superman. As a superhero fan, I've found his character very interesting. Unlike most superheroes, Superman's alter ego is an ordinary, hard working citizen, Clark Kent, who's trying his best to make a living. In most cases the situation is the other way round, with the alter ego usually being the superhero. Also, Superman has an amazing variety of superpowers at his disposal, and more importantly, has a potentially deadly weakness that creates a fine balance.

But most significantly, Superman is considered to be a leader, someone who takes control of things and is unfazed by difficult and seemingly disastrous situations. His moral uprightness and ability to sustain himself beyond human levels of emotion makes him even more special.

So you can understand why I'm disappointed with "Superman Returns". Superman does not only appear to be emotionally weak in this movie, he is shown to have made moral misjudgments and some unwise decisions over time. To be more specific, he tries to wreck a perfectly happy family and is shown to have an illegitimate child. Also, between Louis Lane and him, Louis is the one that has the moral uprightness to say "no" to Superman's rather open advancements. Followers of Superman comics and cartoons would note that it was rather Louis Lane who used to openly pursue Superman, with Superman being the one who used to play it cool.

Also, Louis Lane's personality in the movie does not match the character itself. Louis Lane is supposed to be annoying, stubborn, confident, big mouthed and usually gets her own way, whereas in the movie she's quiet, dreamy, very emotional and really not that irritating. I think making her a mom has changed most of her personality.

But, overall, the movie itself wasn't terrible. However, I expected more coming from the Superman franchise.

Is it a bird?

Reincarnation may sound cool to some people, but perhaps it wouldn’t be too appealing to someone who turns into a rock for a lifetime. Considering rocks last a lot longer than humans or for that matter any living thing, I imagine it to be really boring. It’ll be a lot more fun if we were all able to choose what to become in another life. Given the option, I’d choose to be a bird. Make that a hummingbird. Then I’ll be able to do that cool helicopter thing they do. Or maybe I’d like to be a bald eagle, soaring away through the earth’s atmosphere while zooming in on anything of interest using my ultra powerful eyesight.

But it’s really the flying part that gives me the kick. Having flown in a few of my dreams, I can make a weak claim of knowing how it feels. That’s why I envy Superman. That and Lana Lang, of course. But even after that, I’d still like to be Batman more than Supes. Why, you ask. Well firstly, the blue and red color combo is way too outer space for me (or for that matter, a bit too American). But to be honest, it’s not about Superman being uncool (because he isn’t); it’s more about Batman being way cooler than anyone else.

Well, the thing about Batman is that he’s as human as you and me, which gives a regular person the belief that he too can be a superhero one day. The point being, you don’t need to have superpowers to be a superhero. All you need to have is muscles, martial arts skills, lots of money and, yeah, a cool ride. In fact the ride itself should be enough. I wouldn’t mind having a sidekick female superhero to assist me in my acts of kindness. That would ensure that I don’t mentally screw myself up fighting psychotic villains day in and day out. Plus, it’ll be great to have someone to talk to. From what I gather, most superheroes have problems when it comes to their social lives. A female sidekick will surely solve most of this.

So to make sense of this post I’ll clarify my position. I’d want to fly in another lifetime but I’d like to be Batman in this one.